Realized today that I haven’t contributed to the old brain dump since before Thanksgiving. Turns out refocusing and resetting are a little more difficult than I’d tricked myself into believing. I’ve been meaning to pop in here, I just haven’t really had anything to say short of pointless shouting into the void. There are few times in my life that I’ve felt less creative and less inspired than I have in the past month or so.
But! With the new year upon us, I figure there’s no reason I can’t just check in and let everyone know how things tuned out writing-wise in 2016.
I went into 2016 with a couple of goals, I wanted to flesh out a short story I’d been working on and complete my first novel; or at least a novella… No point pushing the length further than the story required. I didn’t do that.
I wanted to complete a writing goal of at least 10,000 words per month for the whole year. I didn’t do that either. Also, I got a rejection letter from another publisher on New Year’s day. So, that’s… Inspiring? Whatever, it was for the same story I already got published once.
What I did do, though, was write a hell of a lot more than I did in 2015. Though I didn’t reach my intended 120,000-word count for the year, the final count for 2016 was 100,028 words. Which is god damned great for me. Especially since I did next to nothing for the last two months.
And I’m off on a good start this year as well as I’ve already completed one short story, and have ideas for a few others. I’m still not super motivated, but at least I’m not drawing from a dry well. I’ve also recently felt the itch to try drawing again. I haven’t done so, yet; but I’m considering it. If I make anything worth seeing, you’ll see it. Got a couple pieces from competitions I wrote up last year that’ll see some editing and hit the story section in the near future as well.
I didn’t realize how invested I’d become in the Presidential election. While I’ve had lots of opinions about basically everything in the past, I’d always managed to remain largely apolitical as a result of disagreeing with everyone. This time, though, I got sucked into it. Not because I necessarily supported anyone, but rather because one candidate appeared so hand-wringingly evil I couldn’t stand on the sidelines and snark anymore.
When comic-book villainy took the day, I felt… Deflated, really. I don’t really know how to express it, and I’m not going to try lest I get sucked back into it. But it left me drained, aimless, a little nihilistic and yearning for some manner of escape.
I turned to drugs… Well, I turned to video games, which is very similar. I got my hands on a Nintendo 3DS XL and the newest Monster Hunter game. Man, I love Monster Hunter. No game feels as punishing but also so incredibly rewarding as Monster Hunter. I love the aesthetic, probably more so than any other game I’ve played… The look of the game is so wonderfully fantastic, and inventive but also incredibly grounded and practical. It’s fantasy in a very believable way.
Best of all, though, is it’s inspiring. It makes me want to write. I’ll probably write Monster Hunter fan fiction at some point in the next 365 days. So look out for that! I don’t typically set New Year’s resolutions, and I’ve no intention of breaking that trend; however, I’m maintaining my intention to write more. More, in this context, is “more than last year.” So the target is 100,029 words.
Ultimately, the point of all this is… I’m good. I got really down in the dumps for a bit, but I’m picking myself up, dusting myself off, and getting back into the swing of things. I want to do things. I just have to convince myself they’re worth doing.
…And I need to spend a little less time on the interwebs.